Yours 'Til the Holy Chao Moos

Some days I have so little emotional attachment to the world in general. I know you know what I'm talking about, brokengiveafuckitis. Days like this it's a very good thing I'm not President. Things would go boom, heads would roll.

I think I'm in dire need of intellectual stimulation. This whole, not having a job, not having anything except house cleaning to do.. gawd it's gotten old fast. I find that I have less and less patience with, well, pretty much everything. I spend way too much time locked up in my own mind.. it's a dark and stormy landscape in there.. you don't wanna spend much time inside.

I find myself bored. I've never experienced bored before this last year. I don't like it much I can tell ya. It's not a happy place for me, leads to much masturbation and ennui. I have discovered that I'm a disgusting freak! There are things that get my motor running that might not be to everyone's taste... sometimes not even to mine.. it disgusts me and I like it.

I can't find much inspiration about anything to write, draw or paint either.. and with my Poser installation broken and seeming unfixable at this point, I can't even fart around with that. I spend my day staring at the screen, surfing porn, watching lame ass watch it now movies on Netflix, talking to the dogs and cat..

Did I mention that it's dismal outside? Week before last it was so hot you couldn't breath, this week it's cold and drizzly. My knee is acting up and I still don't have enough energy to go out for a walk or anything.. couldn't probably hold a job right now if I had one. Sigh, this sucks. Honestly, I don't know what to do about it either. Won't be long before the depression sets in good and strong I'm sure. I have really got to get better and get moving because otherwise this is way too slow suicide.

Whiny? me? ya think?